Wednesday, September 14, 2011

On Humanity and Walmartians...

Perhaps WalMart isn't the last place on Earth I should ever have to go to. Hmmm...
A momentary rant from me on FaceBook last night questioning the incongruity of humans wound its way around to the subject of "Walmartians" surprisingly quickly. Well, maybe not so surprising, actually, as it seems that Walmartians have made an impression on most every one in, I daresay, the universe. (Disclaimer: Lest there start to be confusion and raised eyebrows by my commentary, let me say that I do not believe the act of going to WalMart, in itself, makes one a Walmartian. I do not like to go, and I will avoid going at almost all costs. Unfortunately, their pharmacy does have prices that we would be idiots to ignore. And we are typically not idiots.) Anywho, a wonderfully witty friend asked if "my" WalMart was like "hers" in that she goes there "to feel thin and sophisticated".  Ha! That's funny.'s also true. And I quickly realized that when I do have to go to WalMart, the Walmartians make me feel brilliant. Like I should be winning the Nobel-Peace-Prize-for-damn-near-anything-brilliant!  Thin, sophisticated, brilliant... Why am I not spending every day there?!?!  So thank you, Meg, for realigning my perspective!

Of course that was not at all where I was focusing when I questioned, "What is wrong with people?"  But it's a really hugely infinitely broad question. My issues at the moment were the basic lacking of integrity in many people, and the overwhelming propensity for spreading negativity, venom, and hatred at any and every opportunity. I just don't understand what people get out of being that way. Are they so miserable with life that they must try to make others miserable as well? Are they so consumed with arrogance that they believe their perspective on all matters is the only perspective that can even be considered?? Is their world really so small that any thing they don't understand (and won't bother to learn about) is a dire threat to them???  I have no idea. But I think it's probably all of these things.  It's a big, diverse world people. Lighten the fuck up.  (Disclaimer: Aforementioned address not directed, most likely, to anyone reading here. Unless, of course, there is a small-minded, arrogant neanderthal that has found his/her way here; in which case, I'm sorry to say, you're probably not even aware of it.)

It's Wednesday Massage day. Thank goodness! Hopefully even an opportunity to address lack of resolution with chiropractor. Then an appointed blood-letting.  Vampires in scrubs in broad daylight. What a gimmick! And I now feel compelled to say...

Hey y'all, I'm going to WalMart today! Anybody want to join me?


  1. The first time I went to Wal-Mart, I was told by an employee that I was a "classy lady." Those aren't really words I've ever heard being addressed to me, so I got a huge high off it.

    Sometimes, when I wander around my local Wal-Mart and people are annoying the bejesus out of me, I just try to remember that it's the only place that I can be considered classy. =)

  2. That's awesome! You can totally channel Julie Andrews while you shop.

    I've obviously been missing great opportunities for self-esteem boosts. Would it be too much to sashay through the store doing a princess wave? =)

  3. Hey now, I'm a small-minded arrogant neanderthal! Watch your language!

  4. Walmart makes me crazy. I try to avoid that place at all costs.

  5. Oh, but're aware of your neanderthal status. That's half the battle, won right there! ;)

    Jack, taking the enlightened perspective helps if you run out of avoidance and HAVE to go there. I tried it out yesterday, and didn't feel nearly as uncomfortable as I normally do. I'm not sure they all appreciated my princess waving, though...

  6. I don't "shop" at Wal-Mart, so when I do go, it's for like, one thing. I walk in and think "dear God, this is not worth it for a box of band-aids." I DO like the idea of going to feel better about myself, though.

  7. I hate walmart, but it is the closest store to our house so I find myself there alot...and most of the time I leave pissed off.

  8. I hear ya, Paula. Even with the princess wave and basking in my sophistication and brilliance, I usually wind up annoyed before I can get out.

  9. The question of ethics is hard at the best of time. In consumer habits it's almost impossible!

    For the longest time I tried to NOT buy things made in China. That type of buying, IMO, added to the trade deficit and at the same time contributed to the exploitation of powerless workers on subsistence wages.

    You can imagine how long that crusade lasted! If you're curious try, for one month, to not buy anything that is made in China.

    I just hope we don't end up with so few retail options that it we cannot shop without going to Walmart. If this comes to be then it's my guess that the end of the world is imminent!

  10. I never go to Wal-Mart because I'm too easily overstimulated. This post, however, reminded me it's been ages since I went to People of Wal-Mart and I'm due for a visit!